its a beautiful day in the neighborhood

sorry for the previous classy but terrible but not classy (CBTBNC) post, friends. i am feeling much better today. i am about to eat a delicious turkey sandwich and then go outside to paint and enjoy the beautiful weather. sighhh...the Lord is so good!

i recently discovered a website featuring pictures of a velociraptor stalking michael buble. i would be lying if i said it wasn't the best thing i have ever seen.

i am not feeling tacky OR fabulous right now.

what is the opposite of tacky but fabulous? classy but terrible? i guess i am that. except not classy.

things i need immediately:
1. this dress
2. a place to wear it

i.love.baylor.

the game on friday was AMAZING.
today my bears are playing duke for a place in the FINAL FOUR.
the game is in houston. i am in austin. my heart is split.
no matter the outcome today, i am SO PROUD to be a baylor bear.

RIP EM UP TEAR EM UP SIC EM BU!!!

how excited am i for this game?

SO. FREAKING. EXCITED.

its time for some RTAT.

friends. i need some RTAT (real talk about theatre).

as some of you may or may not know, when i am not busy being tacky but fabulous in my every day life, i'm an actor. BAH. that sounds so ridiculous to say. "i'm an actor." never have i ever been paid to be on stage. if that's how you define being an actor, i am not one. but i have a degree in theatre performance. i love acting. i can't NOT act. i feel most like myself when i am portraying someone else. nothing is better than taking an audience on a journey, making them laugh or think or cry or be confused or whatever. if that's how you define being an actor, i AM one of those.

anyway. i have an audition on sunday. no big deal, right? auditions are what actors do. i'm an actor (see: previous paragraph). but (here is a secret) (or if you prefer, RTAT) i am terrified/terrible at auditioning. if the word "terror" is in it, then i am that when it comes to auditioning. ugh. i hate it. probably should have thought that through before, oh, i dont know, CHOOSING MY CAREER, AMIRIGHT??

so tonight i was thinking, as i always do in the days leading up to an audition, what if i don't get it? the intellectual part of me knows that its not a big deal. people go on hundreds and thousands of auditions before they get a role; not every part is perfect for you; maybe you're just not what they're looking for; insert other theatre cliche here. but i can't help but feel that maybe it IS a big deal. i'm a year out of college and i feel stagnant and all my friends are off doing these great big things in the world of theatre and i'm here, living in my parents' house, and knowing that i shouldn't compare myself to others but not being able to help it. it would be another case of not being good enough or "what they want" enough or ENOUGH enough.

and THEN i started thinking...what if i DO get it? i mean, obviously, that would be amazing. but i couldn't help but think of all the things i would have to miss if i did get this job. how much of the next year or so would be taken up by this project. how many friends i wouldn't get to see. how many other opportunities i might have to turn down. how much of life would pass by without me involved. and even how much (wait for it...this is literally awful. it just crossed my mind for a second, but the fact that it crossed my mind AT ALL is disgusting. i seriously hate myself for this) time i wouldn't get to spend on facebook. HEADCASE, PARTY OF ME!! really, how screwed up is that?! i can't even make sense of it.

i've spent my whole life being afraid of failure. but now i am starting to feel like i am also afraid of success.

who has two thumbs and a ticket to see the baylor men's basketball team play in the sweet sixteen on friday?

THIS GIRL!!

truth is truthful

let's revisit that to-do list

• unpack from waco trip - yeah, whatever.
  
• similarly, stop living out of a suitcase - um...yeah, whatever.
  
• choose comedic monologue for audition on sunday - CHECK. well, kind of. its narrowed down to two.
  
• LEARN comedic monologue for audition on sunday - about that....
  
• buy a present for melissa's wedding shower - nope.
  
• walk my sister's beagle - CHECK!! i am a good aunt to that dog.
  
• write cover letters for internship applications - blerg.
  
• revise resume for internship applications - CHECK! and by "revise" i mean i added "velociraptor walk" as one of my special skills.
  
• WATCH LOST TONIGHT. OMG ITS A RICHARD ALPERT EPISODE. - CHECK AND CHECK, SON! IT WAS SO GOOD!!

never will i ever accomplish anything worthwhile.

i've got things to do, yall

• unpack from waco trip
• similarly, stop living out of a suitcase
• choose comedic monologue for audition on sunday
• LEARN comedic monologue for audition on sunday
• buy a present for melissa's wedding shower
  
• walk my sister's beagle
• write cover letters for internship applications
• revise resume for internship applications
• WATCH LOST TONIGHT. OMG ITS A RICHARD ALPERT EPISODE.

i can almost guarantee that only one of those things will get done today. and it does not have to do with unpacking, auditions, dog walking, wedding showers, or internship applications.

tyra mail!

how did i miss the fact that there is a new cycle of america's next top model??? thankfully youtube is helping me catch up. this show is ridiculous. i secretly want to be on it.

and by secretly i mean i just told the whole world. CHOOSE ME, TYRA! I WILL BE AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL!

and by america's next top model i mean america's next top awkwardly quirky facebook stalker (ANTAQFS).

there should be a reality show about THAT, amiright??

"i have eleven amazing facebook profiles before me, but i only have ten friend requests in my hands. and those friend request represent the ten profiles that are still in the running towards becoming america's next top awkwardly quirky facebook stalker."

i dont think you understand how much i REALLY NEED THESE IN MY LIFE.

UNI-CORN CORN HOLDERS.
THEY ARE CORN HOLDERS SHAPED LIKE UNICORNS.
YOUR ARGUMENT IS INVALID.
TBF!!!!

buy them for me and i will love you forever.

QUOTE LOVE, volume 2

Jean:
Oh, Dwight.
I want to make sure we get on the same planet when we die.
I don't want to end up with my garden or my dog for all time.
Let's start loving each other right now, Dwight -
not a mediocre love, but the strongest love in the world,
absolutely requited.
I want to be selfish with you.
I want to love you because of and not in spite of
your accidental charms.
I want to love you when you burn the toast
and when your shoes are awful
and when you say the wrong thing
so that we know and all the omniscient things of heaven know
too - lets love each other absolutely.

-Sarah Ruhl, Dead Man's Cell Phone

oh, you're my best friend.

unicorn princess heels

i want these.
i need these.
TBF.

i'm in love

...with baylor university theatre.
...with the city of waco.
...with guacamole from ninfas.
...with taking ridiculous amounts of pictures.
...with quoting youtube videos in any and every situation.
...with creating art.
...with seeing great art be created.
...with visiting the places where memories were made.
...with making new memories.
...with my beloved family of BUTs.
...especially with my amazing fellow members of the baylor theatre class of 2009.

love.

TBF: live from waco, texas!

excellent news, friends. TBF is sweeping the nation. and by nation i mean it has successfully traveled from houston to dallas to waco. my two beloved SGF (sassy gay friends) have jumped onboard the bandwagon and we are full speed ahead.

today i wore a dress over leggings, a TBF staple. a few compliments + a few side eyes = outfit win.

i have also seen many dear friends, whom i have not seen in a long time, which is way exciting. and i get to see many more over the next two days! HUZZAH FOREVER!!

unfortunate happenings in MotH (matters of the heart, or man! ow, that hurts!). these feelings are neither tacky nor fabulous.

BUT NEVER FEAR. i will remain TBF and carry on.

STOP LETTUCEPHONIN' ME-EH-EH

this guy is using a head of lettuce as a telephone.
i'm basically obsessed.
he is my spirit animal.
TBF.

well hey there insomnia

i'm totes not able to sleep for the third night in a row. thank the Lord for that klonopin prescription - normally used for panic attacks but now used to make me go to freaking sleep.

in tacky but fabulous news (TBF, if you will. tackbutfab.), i fully intend on doing some shopping tomorrow at the TBF capital of the world, ROSS. how many ten dollar dresses can i get to pair with obnoxiously colored tights and/or leggings? only time will tell.

bring in the lolz. bring in the funk.

being funny on purpose is hard, yall. i was struck with inspiration to start writing this one woman show i've been thinking about forever, so i'm writing, and its not good. like whoa. like, improv isn't EASY exactly, but its easier than this. yeeeeesh. I WILL PREVAIL THOUGH, DON'T WORRY.

because you cant spell sanity without sanitizer. GET IT?? B/C I'M WRITING ABOUT MY OCD?? lolz.

oh dear.

yall. my newest project is going to be EPIC.

it's called "i was a preteen hot mess" and it's basically all my journal entries from childhood. GET READY.

QUOTE LOVE, volume 1

“When I was nine, I asked my Dad, ‘Can I have your movie camera? That old, wind-up 8-millimeter movie camera that’s in your drawer?’ And he goes, ‘Sure, take it.’ And I took it, and I started making movies with it, and I started being as creative as I could, and never once in my life did my parents ever say, ’ What you’re doing is a waste of time.’ Never….. I know there are kids out there that don’t have that support system. So, if you’re out there and you’re listening, listen to me: If you want to be creative, get out there and do it. It’s not a waste of time.”

-michael giacchino, upon winning his Academy Award for Best Original Score

be tacky. be fabulous.

this is my new life motto.
this is my new blog.
this is my new newness.

ooh ooh ooh ooh ooooh, i got a new attitude.